I just found out a friend of mine lost his mom. She went in the hospital for something minor, and it didn't turn out to be that way. She's got more kids, some who are young teenagers.
To go into the hospital thinking everything is going to be fine, that the whole situation is minor, and then to lose your mom...just, ugh. My heart breaks for their family...it's hard to lose someone at any stage of your life, but to lose your mom, before you're married, before she's seen your kids, before you've graduated high school. My mom is my stability. She drives me nuts sometimes, but she is who I go to for everything. When I don't talk to her for a few days it seems like a forever. I can't imagine finding out she was gone.
The hardest part for me is always what to say in a situation like this, and I know I'm not alone. It's just, I'm used to knowing what to say, that's never been an issue for me. And then when it comes to something like this, when I so want to say something that will really help this person feel better...I'm at a loss for words.
When my Gramma died, it really wasn't awful. It wasn't sunshine and rainbows, but I had peace. I knew what to say to help my family members, I knew how to handle the whole situation with ease. But my Gramma was sick. It wasn't a shock. We knew it was coming. We had time to say goodbye, and she was so ready to go home.
To me...that peace is so important. When I die, I want there to be no mistake about where I'm going. I want everyone who had any sort of connection with me to know without a doubt that I've gone home, that I'm happier than I've ever been, and that they'll see me again someday. Then it's easy to know what to say.